I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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