Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize