whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
you're hired as official boob wrangler
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
