i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
