I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out