East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I'm too high and old for this...
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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