His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize