after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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