Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize