she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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