I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
time to smoke my breakfast
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.