Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize