I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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