i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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