He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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