I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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