He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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