508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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