His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
