I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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