I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
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I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
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On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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