Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
