after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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