please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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