kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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