I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
