if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
