have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
