I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
