wake up i wanna do it froggy style
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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