She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
