If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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