is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
That reminds me...we need to get swords
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
