whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
