My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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