I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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