She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
