he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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