So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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