Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
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just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
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Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
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