when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
