woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize