I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
