Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
