East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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