I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
