I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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