Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
