They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize
