porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
