When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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