Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
